Communication Sex and Intimacy

3 Reasons “Special Days” Don’t Help Your Marriage

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This past Valentine’s Day, my wife Ashley and I did something unique. Instead of just doing something to benefit our marriage, we wanted to do something to help YOUR marriage.

We’ve partnered with some friends to launch a new marriage resource site called, and we all decided to use Valentine’s Day as a way to get a marriage-building message out.

We spent thousands of dollars and many hours of planning and traveling to do a one-day billboard campaign which started a LOT of conversations. You can watch the video below.

We chose Valentine’s Day for this one-day push, because we know that many couples look to “special days” on the calendar as an opportunity to focus more on their marriage, BUT the messages we were sharing on those billboards and on our new site are designed to help your marriage EVERY day of the year.

Here are 3 quick reasons why holidays and “special days” probably don’t do much to help your marriage:

1. When we put all our emphasis on being romantic one day out of the year, it gives us the excuse of being unromantic the remaining days of the year.

2. When we’re starved for time together and memorable experiences, we can build up special holidays so much that they can never live up the hype so we walk away feeling disappointed instead of feeling recharged.

3. Marriages are shaped by what we do consistently, and one-day annual events don’t do much to help us create healthier habits in our marriage.

I’m still a fan of holidays and birthdays and doing something romantic and thoughtful on each of them, but I’m a bigger fan of creating a marriage where every day feels like a special day!

For more tools to help you build a rock-solid marriage 365 days a year please explore this site and help us spread the word so we can encourage other couples too.

Also, be sure to sign up for our 30 Days to a Stronger Marriage email series

If you have any ideas, questions or topics you’d like to see addressed, please feel free to contact us anytime.

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