I recently wrote a post about the 4 Things Every Husband Desires From His Wife, which generated a lot of discussion, and many have asked for a follow up addressing those things women desire from their husbands. Since I’m a guy, I’m clearly not any kind of expert on what women desire or think, so I asked my amazing wife, Ashley (who was the inspiration behind the first post), and she gave me some very wise insights to share with you.
Husbands, let’s rise to these challenges and love our wives well! Your marriage not only impacts your wife, but also your children and future generations. By how you love your wife, you are teaching your sons how to treat women and you are teaching your daughters what they should expect from men. Let’s commit to giving our wives and families our very best!
This is not a comprehensive list, but here are four things most women desire from their husbands:
1. Open, honest, consistent communication.
Communication does for a marriage what breathing does for your lungs. Be willing to turn off ESPN and put your iPhone down and engage in meaningful conversation. Never hide anything from her! Build a foundation of trust, honesty and open communication. Every one of your words and every action is either building more of her trust or eroding her trust in you. Remove distractions and make communication a high priority.
2. Protection (Physical, emotional and financial protection). You should be the one who wipes away your wife’s tears; not the one who causes them! Develop the discipline to work hard inside and outside the home to make your wife feel like the safest and most secure woman on earth. Have the courage to fight for your family and the faith to recognize that you need a power greater than your own. The Bible challenges us by saying…“Don’t be afraid of the enemy! Remember the Lord, who is great and glorious, and fight for your brothers, your sons, your daughters, your wives, and your homes!” (Nehemiah 4:14)
3. Your time. (Both “quality time” and “quantity time”) Time is the “currency” of relationships, so invest as much time as you can into your marriage. You need to make money, but don’t use your career as an excuse to be absent. When you are home, be present, not distracted or glued to a screen. Work hard, but also remember that your family can do with less of almost anything if it means having more of you.
4. Continuous pursuit.
For most of us, we gave our wives the best we had in the very beginning, but just like a cable TV company that offers their best package, pricing and service at the beginning and then changes all the rules after the “promotional period” expires, many of us have stopped giving our wives the best of ourselves. We’ve allowed romance to fade. Our wives need and deserve our continued adoration, thoughtfulness, and love. Give her your very best each an every day!
Don't give up on your marriage. It is worth the effort and investment. If you feel like your marriage is struggling, or even failing, there is hope. There is healing.