Sex and Intimacy

You Don’t Have to Cheat to Be Unfaithful

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There are few areas where fidelity is more important than in the intimate confines of a family. As both a pastor and a cop, I’ve seen firsthand the variety and enormity of the consequences that come with being unfaithful to one’s family.

One of the many illusions of porn is that it is a victimless offense, a harmless act where nobody is truly hurt. But I’ve noticed that even those who believe this lie still tend to hide their actions. They’re still clearing out their web histories and keeping their computers in private locations. I haven’t come across too many people who openly look at porn in front of their spouses or children (although I know there are some that do).

But to the vast majority who secretly engage in this activity, I have this question: if there’s nothing wrong with porn, then why keep it secret?

Fidelity is so much more than just not having an affair or cheating in some way on your spouse (Tweet This!). It goes far beyond that; to view it as less is to rob yourself and your family of the deepest of intimate experiences. Like porn, the person who views it is casting an illusion that they are unaffected by such things, that they are above such debauchery, that they don’t have a problem. Then, when discovered, things come crashing down, their reputation, their relationships, their dignity… you get the idea.

Porn is like mold, settling into the dark and secret places of your life and then growing in obscurity, eating away and undermining the integrity of your most cherished relationships. How many of us would want our sons and daughters entering the porn industry and making these videos? Yet we allow ourselves to indulge in the actions of others’ sons and daughters? To struggle with temptation is one thing, but to constantly give in to something that hurts your family is something completely different. It’s betrayal, and not just to our families but to ourselves as well.

You don’t have to cheat to be unfaithful; you just have to use.

This article was originally published here and is used with permission –  http://www.xxxchurch.com/men/you-dont-have-to-cheat-to-be-unfaithful.html

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  • Bob Moore

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